He doesn’t smoke. He doesn’t drink. He goes to church. He’s soft-spoken, smart, and responsible.

He’s the kind of man any girl would be proud to bring home. To introduce to your family. And I did.

But even then, he still cheated. A situation I never imagined I’d be in.

I thought I had found my person. I was faithful. Devoted. And certain that he was my soulmate. I trusted him with everything I had because he never gave me a reason not to.

We attend different universities, so I don’t see him much during the day, but we always make sure to meet after classes, even if it’s late. He would tell me about his day, and I would tell him about mine. It was a ritual that felt grounding. It was comforting. It was a good breather.

He became a part of my home and a part of my family. My parents loved him. My siblings adored him. My nephew would even hug him first before me. He belonged. Or at least, that’s what I thought.

The truth came out in pieces. And when it did, I broke. Hands shaking. Trembling. Unable to breathe. Nausea lingered in my stomach for days.

 The man I thought I would marry was not the man I actually knew. 

I couldn’t understand why. Why would he do that? Why would someone throw away something so pure and true? Why betray the very person who would have given them everything? Why fail someone who’s been there with you through ups and downs?

I don’t want to go into every detail, but if I could give one piece of advice to all the girlies out there, it would be this: trust your instincts.

 You’re not crazy for overthinking. Your gut knows before your heart is willing to admit it. Ask questions. Seek answers. Confront the truth. Even if it hurts. Do everything that would put your heart and mind at ease. 

It’s not your fault that they betray you. And they cheated not because you weren’t enough. It’s not because you failed. It’s because he chose to break what you built. He is the problem.

And maybe you’ll sit there in your room, like I did, asking yourself what you could have done differently. 

Maybe you’ll cry yourself to sleep. 

Maybe you’ll feel like you’ve lost yourself entirely. 

But please, don’t let that pain convince you that you’re unworthy.

You are not the problem. He is.

Healing. It will take time. I still find myself trembling even as I write this. It still hurts. Everything is still fresh. It’s like a wound that hasn’t closed yet. But I know I’ll get there.

Because he’s not the good guy I thought he was. Someday, I’ll find peace in knowing that I loved with all I had, even when he didn’t.